I am SO trained

You've heard the expression: "Dogs have owners, cats have staff"? Here is how Bert has neatly managed to train his staff:

As I sit at my table writing, Bert peeps for the milk ring. He is a peeper, not deigning to meow, or even growl. He makes tiny bird noises. That's why I named him Bert. Kind of like 'bird' and kind of like the noise he makes. So: 'Peep?' Pleeeease, mom?'
















I toss the milk ring and he races after it like no tomorrow. He likes to grab it with his mouth and put it on his paw like a bracelet. Then fling it all over the room. 'Wheee! This is fun! What's coming next is even more fun! Bwa ha ha'















He usually flings it toward any piece of furniture that is low to the ground that has an inch or two of access under it, like this bookcase here. The bed is high. That'd be too easy. 'I'm just going over here to the BOOKCASE and play here for a minute. Yeah, that's it.'















'Oh noes! I accidentally on purpose pushed it WAY under the bookcase, Mom, I can't get it! Peep! Peep! Peep! Peep! Peep! Peep!
















So because the peeps are so cute, and after thirty of them, pretty annoying, I get up, fish the milk ring out with a stick, and toss it again. TRAINED!